Reflecting on Motherhood...

Happy Mother’s Day One Day Late! I hope you had a great day. My day and weekend was fabulous. I feel refreshed and loved! Perfect-o Day-o!

One thing about Mother’s Day that I love is that it reminds me to reflect on my life as a Mommy. Am I the mom, I want to be? How can I improve at being a Mom? What blessings are in my mommy life? I think it is good to reflect often on these questions and I would love to read your answers…

Am I the Mom I want to be?

I am always pretty hard on myself and have high expectations for my kids and for me. This can be a positive and negative quality at the same time. I think I am a good mom… but there is always room for improvement. Still, let’s stop and pat ourselves on the back… what do we do right? Here are my areas of mommy shine:

I try my best to make sure my kids know that I love them and some days that means stopping and just cuddling them or watching the do something and giving them a genuine compliment. I believe that high self-esteem is the single most important gift that a parent can give their kids. A person with a high self-esteem values himself and will not get into, or stay in, an poor relationship. A person with high self-esteem is more likely to be happy and to reach his or her full potential. I teach my kids self-esteem: by showing them that I value them, by spending time with them, and by talking with them and listening to them.

I know how to have fun… Let’s face it, kids grow fast. I even notice with my son that the days of lying on the floor with him and just rolling around tickling him are pretty much over (wipe tear from my eye). Yeah I can give him a little tickle here and there… but I get “O, mom!” now. My daughter and I can spend a good 20 minutes rolling around the living room floor tickling, playing airplane, and making silly faces. I find as a mom it is too easy to become a robot… Take Charley here and there, get homework done, make dinner, bath, bed, and repeat! Moms become so absorbed in the daily ho-hum that they forget to be silly and laugh with the kids. I try my best to just let go at the right times. I have been know to jump in puddles, squirt my kids with a hose when they are fully dressed, talk in a silly voice all day, and just let loose and be a kid with them for a little bit now and then. Kick the soccer ball, play catch, go for a bike ride, and make a moment with your child! Before you know it they will be packing those bags and heading to college.

I know that I am the Mom, not the friend… Hopefully I will continue to realize that as my kids grow. Families have changed over the years. It seems like now a days families are more democratic in their child raising believes. Let’s listen to our kids and hear them out! That is all good and well but kids still need us to be their parents and set clear limits. We should listen to them and respect them – but I have to remind myself that I am not their friend and God certainly did not put me on Earth to be a friend to my child (hopefully that will come when they are adults). When I was a younger and a teenager, I would get so mad at mom and dad for things and say stuff like, “I’m not going to be your friend anymore! Or I (gasp) hate you!” My parents would look at me calmly and respond, “We aren’t supposed to be friends, We are your parents and you are our daughter”. It used to drive me nuts, but they were right (imagine that – parents know best??). Our job is to be our kids’ mothers – not their friends. I think so far, I’ve got that down…

One thing I am getting better at is just letting go and letting my kids solve their problems. I have a good friend who I met when my son was about 18 months and I was always amazed at how she just let her kids experience things on their own without stepping in. If the kids were fighting over a toy… She would just sit back and watch. Me I jumped in and scolded my son. As the kids got to be older (say 4ish) and would fight. My girlfriend would put them together in the same timeout chair to work out their problems. Funny, how this method worked. I was learning at the time and still being a helicopter mommy. I am getting better of letting go and letting my kids figure it out themselves. I question rather than offer the answer and try to let them come to their own conclusions about things. I still drive them often to a conclusion… but I am better at going about it. The sense of accomplishment that comes with being independent is immensely important for a child. As much as I like to feel needed, I try to let my kids be as independent and self-sufficient as they possibly can.

Ways I would like to improve?

Patience – I know most moms want more of it… Raising kids is hard work. How many times have you started to get work done to be interrupted by a temper tantrum or a little voice saying “I have nuthin to do!” Don’t you have a play room of toys child??? Or when you know the kids are bored and they decide to bother their brother or sister for something to do and crying usually follows by one of the children involved? UGH!!! Here comes mom with her head about ready to pop-off!!!

I need to stop pulling out my hair and take a deep breath, pray, and be calm. It seems like when I do accomplish the breathing/praying approach the outcome is always better and both the kids and I are happier.

Push my Kids – But Not So Hard

My parents pushed me… but sometimes I think they should have given me a bigger push. I think I was a bit of a slacker because they were pretty democratic in the way they raised me. But that is probably just me reflecting my issues on to them. I turned out pretty good in the long run...  Still, I push and push my kids too much sometimes. They are 4 and 7 and I am already thinking about their future. I definitely know that I need to figure out a balance to how hard I push. My son does very well in school and the only bad grade he has gotten in his little school career is a P in handwriting. I freaked out and started making him practice everyday. Then one time about a week ago I got upset because he had a perfect spelling record and he missed one thus bring his 100% average for the year to a 98%. O-God, yes I am one of those parents. I was totally bothered by it and he is a first grader. Unfortunately, I see him pushing himself to perfection in academics and even in sports and piano. Sometimes my always happy little guy just looses it and breaks down and I know that a lot of that comes from the bar I set for him. I most need to work on teaching him it is ok to miss a few; it isn’t the end of the world. It is ok if you aren’t the best at something. As long as you tried your best, that is what matters.

What a Blessing Being a Mom is:

I always tell me kids that they were a present from God to me and their Daddy. It was the greatest present that God could ever give us. I thank God everyday for them, sometimes I thank God multiple times a day (especially on the days they are being really good – lol!) The best is when you are doing nothing exciting and you catch a glimpse of your child in a moment to themselves and you just feel an incredible sense of love for them. It’s better than any drug! I love that when my daughter is asked how she got so pretty she will reply, God made me that way. If she sees a picture of me before kids and then asks where she was and I tell her she wasn’t born yet she says, “I was just a dream that God was making.” My son doesn’t pass a soul without giving them a smile… If I had a nickel for all the times people tell me how he is always smiling or always happy, I would seriously be rich! “Is he always happy? Does he ever stop smiling?” I am blessed in more ways than words can say as a mother. Being a mother is the hardest job that only lasts a few short years… It is the greatest gift and my only true hope is that I can raise my kids with a great love of God. If I can do that, I pretty much feel the rest will fall into place. 

Thanks for reading. I would love to hear your mommy tips, what you need to improve, and how you are blessed as a mom.

Activities for Five Minutes' Peace

'PreSchool-Grade 2 Mrs. Large determines to have just five minutes' peace from the mess and confusion of her beloved children. She fixes herself a tray, runs a tub of lovely warm water, fills it with bubble bath, and hopes for those precious moments alone before facing the day's activities. The ``activities'' follow her to the bathroom, where, one by one, they present her with their special talents of playing the recorder, reading aloud, and dumping favorite toys from the toy box into the tub with her. When all three children climb in, Mrs. Large decides, with a groan and resignation, that she will try for five minutes' peace in the kitchen. Cheerfully bright watercolor illustrations depict this endearing elephant family with distinctive humor and expression, totally complementing the text on companion pages. However, while the text is simplistic enough for primary readers, the humorous depiction of a beleaguered mother is adult-oriented. Some children may wonder why Mrs. Large wants to get away from her children. Nevertheless, a hearty chuckle can be experienced during a shared reading time between a mother and her childrenperhaps eliciting a bit of understanding.' Mary Lou Budd, Milford South Elementary School, Ohio

Activities to Match This Super Cute Story!

Ask your class why they think Mrs. Large wants to getaway from her kids. The answers are always fun to hear!

Now have the kiddos make a card. On the front of the card, have them draw their mom taking a bath.

Inside the card, put this poem!

Here's a gift for Mother's Day.

I try my best in every way.

But if you get upset with me...

Time to relax and soak!! Don't you agree?

For Mother's Day, I give you Five Minutes' Peace!'

Love,
(Author Unknown)



Attach to some homemade bath salts.

Click here to learn how to make bath salts

You could attach bath beads or bubble bath.

For more Mother's Day Ideas, click here!

The Gift of an Ordinary Day!

A mommy friend of mine sent this to me. This summarizes the ordinary days of being a mom and reminds you to soak in those days, because soon your will be standing on your tippy-toes kissing your son goodbye as he heads for college.... you will be hugging your daughter as you leave her college dorm. If you are looking for a good mommy cry... this 8 min. video is it and then you will want to go enjoy an Ordinary Day!

Make Your Own Earrings

Happy Saturday Everyone! Let's try a mommy craft today!!!

I feel so lucky to have such crafty friends... One of the most creative friends I have wrote a special tutorial for this blog! Rebecca at http://jewelryandgiftsbyrebecca.com/ is going to tell us how to make earrings. I will tell you that if I can do this, you can too!!! I have sat with her once before and made two earrings. I did learn I would rather pay her to make them for me... because she is the best and she can make anything; however, I did it with no pain. Check out her site and you will see. Here is Rebecca teaching us how to make earrings...

My name is Rebecca and I’m addicted to earrings. OK there, I said it. Seriously, I really do need a program or something. I even started my own jewelry business to support my need to accessorize. I can’t help but think that adding color-coordinated earrings to your outfit is the easiest and most inexpensive way to jazz up you wardrobe. I have even pulled some of my friends in with me. We had a great time one evening making our own earrings. It really doesn’t take much time. Even if you don’t think you are crafty, you will be able to do it following these simple directions. All the supplies can be found easily at any craft or do-it-yourself store.

Here is your shopping list:

Supplies: 2 Head pins (They are usually sold in a pack of 10 or so) You will need them to be at least one inch long but in some stores you may be able to find them in longer measurements.

1 ½ or 2 inches, tops.
2 Ear wires (They too are usually in a pack of 10 or so)
Beads (vary the colors and sizes for interest). 4mm, 6mm or 8mm are good sizes to get started.

Tools:
Round nose pliers (both the tips of these pliers are round and cone shaped)
Flat nose pliers (these are smooth so they don’t leave a mark on your metal)
Wire cutters
(You can most likely find all of these pliers in an economy tool kit at the craft store. They are also sold individually)

Before you go shopping, I have a few helpful hints for you. You will be better off, if you make sure the metal component or findings that you purchase are sterling silver or gold filled. Avoid buying metal that is not of a higher quality. When you are selecting your beads, go for glass, synthetic gems/stones or natural shells. I avoid plastic beads because most of them just look cheap. Swarovski crystals are at the top of the list for quality with Czech fire-polished beads at a close second in quality with a better price. Beyond that, you will need to be careful that you don’t get a pressed glass, which can sometimes have a seam around the edge, or some cheaper beads that may have inconsistencies in their coloring. This is from the method that is used in the production of the bead. Some are just sprayed or painted with color and that can actually rub off with frequent use. Better quality beads are made from colored glass or coloring that has been fired onto the surface of the glass.

Once you have everything lined up and the kids down for a nap, you are ready to go.
First you need to decide what sizes and colors you are using, and get them in the order that you like best. I usually put the larger one on the bottom and then gradually get smaller as I add to the design. Or you may want to start small, get big, then go small again. This works best if you keep it symmetrical. You can slide your beads off and on the head pin until you have found a pattern that you enjoy. You should be sure to leave at least a ¼ of an inch at the top on the pin. While you are holding the beads on as tight as you can, bend the top of the head pin down forming a right angle. If you have more than a ¼ inch you can trim that off using the wire cutters. To be sure you are safe; hold the earring and cutters partially in the wastebasket and turn your head away while you cut. Those end pieces can fly when they get snipped off.

Now you are ready for the next step. Find your round nose pliers and hold them in your dominant hand. Hold the earring in the other hand with the pin that you bent pointing right at you. Using the pliers, pinch the end on the pin as close to the edge as possible and roll it and the pliers up and away from you, stopping half way. Reposition the pliers and continue to roll the pin around the nose of the pliers until you have formed a loop at the top on your bead design.

Find your ear wire and using the flat nose pliers, open the loop at the bottom by bending or twisting it to the side. Thread your beaded pin onto this open ring and use the pliers to bend the ear wire closed again. Ta Da! You have one earring. Now do it all again and you’ll have yourself a custom pair of handmade earrings. Here are some of the ones I have on my web site.

http://jewelryandgiftsbyrebecca.com/

Thanks Rebecca for sharing the love of your craft with us! If you try this at home, leave a comment and let us know how it went! If you have purchased from Rebecca in the past, leave us a comment about how you liked your item!!! I am sure she would be thrilled to hear from you!

Now go get your craft on!!!

Two Year Old Help - Keeping Her Busy!!!

Okay, my daughter can be a bit high maintenance. Basically because she has to be busy all the time and if she is not busy, then she wants to be tickled or starts to bother her brother. As a result, I am always looking for things to keep her busy. My newest find is the dishwasher. One of the things I hate most about the dishwasher is unloading the silverware. My daughter helps me unload the plates by handing them to me when I am unloading. The other day I pulled out my silverware drawer and laid it on the floor so she could unload the silverware too. She loved this and it kept her busy long enough so I could write this blog. I also have to admit that I took some silverware out of the drawer just so she could reload it back into the drawer. Wonder how long this fondness of unloading the silverware will last. Anyhow, maybe this trick will give you a few minutes of Mommy time!